Royalists Can Do No Wrong

by Rishadan Port (of the band Faiyen)

Note: This song, “Royalists Can Do No Wrong,” was posted in 2013, and has remained frustratingly relevant up to today, January 6, 2018. Maybe we can add a new verse about Deputy Dictator Prawit Wongsuwan and his many expensive, undeclared watches. We are talking about Deputy Dictator Prawit of the junta that overthrew Thailand’s elected government in order to eliminate corruption, a junta that then wrote a Constitution that says anyone even suspected of corruption has to step down from office until the investigation clears him or her. Yes that Deputy Dictator is now suspected of corruption for owning more than 10 super expensive and undeclared watches that total more than a million dollars. I wonder if he will be suspended from his job until the investigation clears him? Hmmmm . . . .

คนรักเจ้า ทำไรก็ไม่ผิด
People who love the king, can do anything and not be wrong
อ้างว่ารักๆเจ้า ทำไรก็ไม่ผิด
Just claim you love, love the king, then whatever you do, it’s not wrong
อ้างว่าทำเพื่อเจ้า ทำไรก็ไม่ผิด
Claim you do it for the king, and whatever you do, it’s not wrong
Royalists can do no wrong

คนรักเจ้า ทำไรก็ไม่ผิด
People who love the king, do whatever and it’s not wrong
ฆ่านักศึกษาตุลา ก็ไม่ผิด
Kill the October students [in the October 14, 1973, and October 6, 1976 massacres]? It’s not wrong
เอาเก้าอี้ฟาดเพื่อเจ้า ก็ไม่ผิด
Take a chair and beat [someone] for the king? It’s not wrong.*
เอากาแฟสาดคนเพื่อเจ้า ก็ไม่ผิด
Throw coffee on someone for the king? Also not wrong.**

ปิดสนามบิน ยังไงก็ไม่ผิด
Close the airport? Whatever, it’s not wrong.***
ปิดราชประสงค์ ทำไมล่ะถึงผิด
[But] if you close Ratchaprasong [intersection], how come that’s wrong?***
สั่งฆ่าคนตาย ทำไมมันไม่ผิด
To order the assassinations of people, why isn’t that wrong?
Royalists can do no wrong

คนรักเจ้า ทำไรก็ไม่ผิด
People who love the king, do whatever, and it’s not wrong
ใช้สองมาตรฐาน เท่าไรก็ไม่ผิด
However much they use a double standard, it’s not wrong
ตัดสินคดีมั่วๆ ก็ไม่ผิด
Decide [court] cases haphazardly? Also not wrong
ดัดจริตตอแหล ยังไงก็ไม่ผิด
Behave as a liar? . . . Anyway, it’s not wrong.

ทำรัฐประหาร กี่ทีก็ไม่ผิด
Overthrow the government however many times, and [they’re] not wrong
ฉีกรัฐธรรมนูญ กี่เล่มก็ไม่ผิด
Tear up however many constitutions, and [they’re] not wrong.
หมิ่นเจ้าซะเอง ก็ยังจะไม่ผิด
Even commit lese majesty and [they] still won’t be wrong!
Royalists can do no wrong

คนรักเจ้า ทำไรก็ไม่ผิด
People who love the king, do whatever and they’re not wrong
ไม่ว่าจะสาธยาย ยังไงก็ไม่หมด
No matter how they explain it, that’s not the whole thing
เพราะว่าคนรักเจ้า ทำไรก็ไม่ผิด
Because people who love the king, can do anything and they’re not wrong
ไม่ว่าทำเหี้ยแค่ไหน ยังไงก็ไม่ผิด
Even when they do however many more damn things, it’s never wrong

ตอแหลเพื่อเจ้า ทำไรก็ไม่ผิด
Lie for the king. You can do anything and it’s not wrong
ฆ่าคนเพื่อเจ้า ยังไงก็ไม่ผิด
Kill people for the king. Anyway . . . it’s not wrong!
ขอแค่อ้างว่ารักเจ้า ทำไรก็ไม่ผิด
Just claim “I love the King,” whatever you do, it’s not wrong!
Royalists can do no wrong

Royalists can do no wrong
Royalists can do no wrong
Royalists can do no wrong

*This is a reference to the iconic picture from the Thammassat University Massacre on October 6, 1976, in which a man uses a chair to beat the corpse of a dead student hung by the neck from a tree admist a crowd that appears to approve.
**This refers to a news story about an airline stewardess who planned to throw coffee on the daughter of ousted prime minister Taksin Shinawatra.
***Yellow Shirt protesters, claiming to defend the monarchy, closed down two airports in 2008 for more than a week. Police did not move against on them, but tried to resolve the conflict peacefully. See a New York Times story on this.
****Red Shirt protesters, supporters of the outsed Taksin Shinawatra, occupied Ratchaprasong Intersection in Bangkok during protests in 2010. The police finally cracked down on the protesters and expelled them from the streets. The Wikipedia entry on the 2010 Thai military crackdown says there were officially 87 deaths, 79 of which were civilian, but 51 other people are missing.